Thursday, April 26, 2007

Wil of God

Fucking Wil!! I'm sure Jesse (the 13yo boy) must have learned a lot of words tonight from Wil, as he had promised! Especially fingering & clitoris (don't ask your Dad coz he won't know!).

My my... Again I didn't stop laughing the whole show, even though I didn't understand all of the jokes.

Guess what - I'm about to dip myself into the pool of joke orgies - with Stephen and Danny coming up tomorrow night, I need to strap my jaw to my skull before it falls off!!

Sunday, April 22, 2007

worst when

I find myself having a pimple (yes I still have them once in a blue moon, like period, yes) on the area between my upper lips and nose. It's all very Together Again - Everywhere I Go, Every smile I make, I know you are there smiling back at me. Dancing in moonlight, I know you are red, Coz I can see your face, sticking out from me!

What is much worse than feeling the tension on the pimple when I move my lips or shave (oh dear lord), would be if I was having a cold and running nose. Believe me, that's the worst time ever to pick to grow a pimple in that area. The sensation of the pimple exploding everytime you blow your nose is just akin to you looking for a toilet desperately (for #2) in rain when you are late for a job interview. So if you sense that a cold is coming at ya, in addition to the whole bottle of Vit.C that you are gonna swallow, make sure you clean your face well and keep away from oily food.

Now where's my Dalacin-T?

All set

for Wil, Danny & Stephen. There's really not many tickets left so if people wanna laugh please buy tickets now. I'll let you know how I handle two men in one night after Friday. That is, Danny & Stephen. (",)

Saturday, April 21, 2007

Dancing Queens

Mom & cousin dance off!!


It's Earthday tomorrow. We all have to do something, otherwise there'll be no earth tomorrow.

Look around - have you turned off the lights that no one is using? Have you turned off you computer if you are going away for hours? Have you not used as many plastic bags as you possibly can? Have you sorted out your rubbish for plastic containers, glassware and cardboards that can be recycled? When you do your dishes, do you turn your tap to the max when it's actually more efficient to clean them when the water flow rate is less, as you would use more part of a unit of water.

Lit a candle or two, it's more romantic and cinematic watching TV at home. Save power - save your money and save us from drowning in CO2. I don't think it's helping if people still put a lot of plastic bags into a greenbag while doing their shopping. I need to bring my own tupperware to the market if I want to buy chicken or meat. I really hope that someone will come up with ideas of connecting water from washing machine to the tank where water is kept to flush the toilet. And damn the Body Corporate of my god damn apartment, I think you need to change your rules to allow people to hang their clothes on their balconies. First of all it's their balcony - no one invites you to look at their undies. Secondly, isn't it more energy saving and less polluting?

Lastly, have you changed your light bulbs to energy saving ones?

the Hard part isn't over yet

Now the hardest part is to write something in the cards.

If anyone wants me to do their Father's/Mother's/boyfriend's/girlfriend's/baby's/BFF's birthday card, D-O-N-'-T come to me! Unless, of course, if we struck a sinful deal which would be only between U-N-I.

Friday, April 13, 2007

Just a little bit of

Was a little down today. Didn't do quite as well as I would have liked in CT8 but hopefully I'll scrape through. The supposedly after-exam adrenaline-producing shopping spree didn't quite cheer me up. As the exam-and-fruitless-shopping headache snowballed further I decided to call it an arvo and got home. No 300 for me at the cinema tonight either - a bit disappointed 'bout that.

Nonetheless I have got place to vent my frustration. Ta-dah! I sat down and brainstormed for ideas to make cards. Cards for Father's and Mother's days. So early I hear you ask? Not early lor, I always don't have time in May and June due to assignments and exams. Oh god, Mother's day is in fact less than a month to go people! Haul ass and go get something for you Mom already!

So Dad will get the first <3 and Mom second. And it's not just the <3's that they are getting. In fact, each of them will be attached to a card that I haven't conjured yet as my ingredients have just run out. These <3's will be made detachable as they are meant to be combined and framed away! Of course I won't leave the surface that comes in touch with the <3 to be left blank. I'll fill the space with family pictures. Nice eh?

Of course I won't expect my parents to be able to guess the grand design. Afterall, it still depends on the puppet master (i.e. ME) to bring the climax to the show. Can't wait to see the excitement on their faces and to hear the praises too!

Wednesday, April 11, 2007

If I aint got U

I saw this lady yesterday while crossing the street to catch a tram going back home. A familiar face. A face I hadn't forgotten. A brave face. She was blind. I was on the same tram when I first saw her last year. I gave her my seat. And I remember I felt very happy doing so.

She is a blind person. But she can still see. She still walks the walk we walk everyday. She trams, she crosses the road without help, she does it (I assume) every day, just like the next person. She holds out her cane and welcomes every challenge in her way.

I spotted her as we were going in the opposite direction - we were going into the tram each of us had just got off. And we were waiting for the traffic light to turn. As I walked to my tram stop, my sight never left her. I even stopped, in case she tripped and no one stopped. I felt like screaming for people to stop for her. I felt like I needed to help her somehow.

But she needed none of those. She didn't need the world to stop for her as she was able. She followed the trail and stopped right in front of the tram. She got on the tram just fine. And she always got this calm smile on her face. Such bravery. I think I'm welling up.

I burned my palm today. Was too careless. Had a wok and a frying pan on the stove. I placed the handle of the pan near the wok, which blocked me from seeing the handle. So after I stir-fried some vege and wanted to shift the pan, I had forgotten than the handle was also "fried" somehow! And my left palm got a 20-sen coin burn mark. Luckily sis had brought some burn medicine from home and I applied it immediately to sooth the pain.

It got me thinking while taking my shower - after much contemplation. And in the shower I tried not to use my left hand at all. Again I got struck by the possibility of me having no left hand or hands. I wouldn't be able to even soap my armpits! See, if you haven't got your left, what are you going to use to clean your right armpit? And say you don't have your left palm, how will you clean your right hand?

I'm so happy that I can still appreciate what I've got. There are people who are so much less, physically, than I am. Yet they still manage, somewhat better I dare say, than I do.

I'll think before I complain next time.

Sunday, April 08, 2007

my confesSin

OMG I lurrrrrve the hair!! Should I print this pic and bring it to Yudai?

Saturday, April 07, 2007

World's Sexiest Beaches

Oh god...beaches. Which one do you dig? I think I like the shot taken of the beach of JOSE IGNACIO, URUGUAY.

Holiday holiday - come to think about it, I seldom dream about going on a holiday. Damn!

The Drag-gish Sound of Music

Sherly and I went for the The Sound of Drag Music Show at tha make-shift Bosco Theatre on the Yarra River bank last night. Being a sucker for TSOM I wouldn't have missed the show, even for the Hitlers.

As it turned out, it was anything, but, TSOM. I was tricked by the title into believing that they performers were drag queens. In fact they were all women who dressed up like drag queens!! Talking about personality crisis!! They did look like men - or rather they were really good at impersonating drag queens. Oh boi...

The show was bent in every angle possible. First of all Maria was large and short - quite a piece of eye candy for the show I guess. I think the first shock came quite late when the Reverend Mother, out of no where when singing Climb Ev'ry Mountain, upped the ante and made it a dance/disco climb indeed! That was a good one.

And Kurt didn't want to be a man like the Captain anymore - instead he wanted to grow boobs and ended up dancing in exotic club in Russia or something. with Liesel. Captain Von Trapp was no longer charming but instead a life-size stink bomb. And a super long one too - every time he farted. In fact, it was so distinctive and sharp that it took over the place of the wisel that he used. And Kurt had to let out a glass-shattering shriek everytime he announced his entrance into the same room, of course, by farting.

And the lesbianism involved!! You won't believe it - yes Baroness Schräder was the big lesbo! On the other hand Liesel definitely showed that she was playing for both teams.

It was a good show - laughing and the sing-along. My jaw was so sore. Can't wait for more of the Comedy Fest!! Stephen K Amos, Danny Bhoy and Best of Edinburg Fest here I come!!

Thursday, April 05, 2007

I Went, I Saw, I Didn't Quite Conquer (Yet?)

Tramming down Swanston St passing Hype in QV - I think I was being called by the shoes in there. Some of them even SOS-ed me. I had no idea our encounter would be such a self-made tragic one.

And so I went into the shop, almost knocking against the glass wall. Luckily no one saw, or so I thought. Scan scan scan. Aha! I found my love at first. Instinct took over after 4 seconds going into an inner battle of sticking-to-budget vs. sticking-to-impulse. I took that sample shoe to the shop assistant in my trembling hands.

"Sorry sir, we only have size 9."

Only if I had longer toes.

Fine for now... But I won't give up. I will ask them to call other branches to bring in my size 8! Otherwise how you think I got my camouflaged adidas from there last time?

Monday, April 02, 2007

About time

While having my haircut with my (favourite) hairdresser, Yudai, today - suddenly I thought that it was time for me to abuse my birthday.

In the past few years I used my birthday as an excuse to buy myself something. Sometimes, others, to buy me something. I think back in 2003 I bought my first pair of expensive & branded sunnies from Oakley. And in 2004, did I buy 2 pairs of shoes back-to-back which came to AUD450++? And those I extorted my parents' credit card, if you must know.

So what did I do in 2005? Oh yea extorsion again - this time my target got definitely bewildered. I got myself a new Toshiba laptop, which is now deteriorating in form & shape (Dad & Mum simultaneously: access denied; which is why they haven't sent my a new credit card yet, as the day draws closer).

Just last year as I was starting to make some money working part-time, I decided to pamper myself with goodies again! So there so a few hundred bucks to a new pair of Morrissey sunnies and some nice aussieBum undies! I paid for them using the then unearned salary.

All of the above - were all done a couple of months before my real birthday. I'm not surprised that it has become a trend for me. As you know it's April 2 today and the mind starts thinking ahead, from which nothing good can come about.

You know - there's always a nice new cardigan from Calibre which I have had my eyes on since last year; and then there's a new pair of track pants from my beloved aB and a few newly designed undies - my dear ex housemates surely knew how much I loved my undies; what else? I could always appreciate a MX5, in fact any Mazda will do thank you very much; a new jacket from Calibre wouldn't hurt right? In fact it'd keep me so w-a-r-m in winter. In addition, a scarf is inevitable for the coming winter ey? That pink Paul Smith scarf is screaming furiously at me that it would rather sit around my neck than on the shelf.

But I'm going to be a good boy (so not true!) that I'll adhere to my budget religiously and only give in to those desires until the return of the tax-returns. Or I can always think of just another excuse to find myself coming out of the stores with a bag or two. How about doing that after my CT8 exam? What a great way to spend my Friday afternoon yea?

At the end of the day, I'm afraid I'll shove my own words up my @r$e so fast, that I won't even feel sorry for. I'm a slave for myself!

Sunday, April 01, 2007


Been meaning to write about this for a long time but just have forgotten! So S-M-O-K-E-R-S achtung!! Basically I not only hate smokers - I actually hope that they'd all be drowned in their own filth!

I dunno what kinda stupid government actually says that it's OK to smoke in open air. Ain't that just dumb? We all breathe the open air. And by breathe, it means sucking in all the filth which smokers exhale. And it seems quite useless and naive for the Victorian Gov to say that - it's OK if you don't smoke under some shades at a train/tram/bus stop. Obviously they missed a science class where they were supposed to be taught that air actually moves!

I just hope that all smokers are required to pay, not by just increased prices of cigarettes, but to all non-smokers too! And by pay, it's not to the Gov but into my bank account. I ain't get my lungs doing all the filtering for nothing! And to stop people smoking in open spaces outside a building, companies should mandate a smoking lounge for smokers in their offices. Just like smoking lounges at the airport. Sherly said that this had already been done in Indonesia. It's time to step up Australia.

I get so irritated everyday walking in the smoked corridor of DIMA building. And I already got so bold that I frantically fan my face everytime I walk past those polluters. I guess I shouldn't be surprised, but I wish I had taken the picture, by a mom smoking while carrying her child! I got more chill up my spine from that than watching The Ring 2.

Even worse for my friend PJ while she was walking in the same goddamn corridor. A homeless-like smoker was puffing in front of her so she was suffocating in the wake of his pleasure. Therefore she decided to cut past that man. Who knew that sucker actually threw the cigarette at her and called her some nice bitchy names. So much for Australia saying NO to violence against women. That's assault for COL.

Smokers, I don't mind you taking another plot in the ground, but please don't drag my lungs in with you.


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