Thursday, December 01, 2005

PG-rated

Perhaps one of the most interesting and colourful words in the English language today is the word "fuck".

It is the one magical word which, just by its sound, can describe pain, pleasure, love, and hate.

In language, "fuck" falls into many grammatical categories.

It can be used as a verb, both transitive (John fucked Mary) and intransitive (Mary was fucked by John).

It can be an action verb (John really gives a fuck),
a passive verb (Aiden really doesn't give a fuck),
an adverb (Chris is fucking interested in John),
or as a noun (Jared is a terrific fuck).

It can also be used as an adjective (Mary is fucking beautiful) or an interjection (Fuck! I'm late for my date with Mary).

It can even be used as a conjunction (Mary is easy, fuck she's also stupid).

As you can see, there are very few words with the overall versatility of the word "fuck".

Aside from its sexual connotations, this incredible word can be used to describe many situations.

Greetings: "How the fuck are ya?"

Fraud "I got fucked by the car dealer."

Resignation "Oh, fuck it!"

Trouble "I guess I'm fucked now."

Aggression "FUCK YOU!"

Disgust "Fuck me."

Confusion "What the fuck.......?"

Difficulty "I don't understand this fucking business!"

Despair "Fucked again..."

Pleasure "I fucking couldn't be happier."

Displeasure "What the fuck is going on here?"

Lost "Where the fuck are we."

Disbelief "UNFUCKING BELIEVABLE!"

Retaliation "Up your fucking ass!"

Denial "I didn't fucking do it."

Perplexity "I know fuck all about it."

Apathy "Who really gives a fuck, anyhow?"

Suspicion "Who the fuck are you?"

Panic "Let's get the fuck out of here."

Directions "Fuck off.

Disbelief "How the fuck did you do that?"

It can be used in an anatomical description: "He's a fucking asshole."

It can be used to tell time- "It's five fucking thirty."

It has also been used by many notable people throughout history...

"What the fuck was that?" - Mayor of Hiroshima

"Where the fuck is all this water coming from?" - Captain of the Titanic

"That's not a real fucking gun." - John Lennon

"Who's gonna fucking find out?" - Richard Nixon

"Heads are going to fucking roll." - Anne Boleyn

"It does so fucking look like her!" - Picasso

"How the fuck did you work that out?" - Pythagoras

"You want what on the fucking ceiling?" - Michaelangelo

"Fuck a duck." - Walt Disney

"I don't suppose its gonna fucking rain?" - Joan of Arc

"Scattered fucking showers my ass." - Noah

"I need this parade like I need a fucking hole in my head." - John F. Kennedy

2 comments:

moonie_piranha said...

This is a fucking amusing and educational posting! haha....

Ivy said...

this post is so fucking funny it made me laugh like a fucking crazy person and i think i leart from it fucking well dont u think so?

;D

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